ICU hero’s wife offers profanity-laced, hilarious and heartbreaking plea to mask opponents that will have you cheering

The virus doesn’t care who you voted for: Stop being a dick

By Holly Figueroa O’Reilly

Apparently, some of you assholes need some tough love right about now and I’m just the bitch to give it to you so sit down, shut up, and listen.

I’ll apologize upfront for all the swears you’re about to read, but I’ve had it up to :jumps to the International Space Station and back: here with you fucking people and I guarantee, at least one of you assholes needs to hear this. And if you aren’t the asshole that needs to hear it, you definitely know at least one who does.

Apparently, some of you assholes need some tough love right about now and I’m just the bitch to give it to you so sit down, shut up, and listen.

I’m begging you: wear a fucking mask when you go out in public. When I say “mask”, I mean face covering of some sort. A scarf, a bandana…a bra. Whatever it takes, just cover your fucking face.

On Saturday, my husband stopped at the grocery on his way home from treating COVID19 positive patients in the ICU. Other than the employees and him, *not one other person* was wearing a mask.

WTFFFFFFFFFFFF.

Why are you people this way?

Listen, morons, you are putting the employees of the store, not to mention their families and friends, at risk. You know, those front-line workers everyone says they appreciate but YOU apparently don’t really give a fuck about?

“Well, I don’t care if I get it because _____________”

For the sake of argument, let’s put aside the fact that there is absolutely no word you can put in that space to make that sentence make sense. You aren’t wearing a mask to protect *you*, dumbass. You are supposed to be wearing it to protect *them*.

When you don’t wear a mask, you are telling front-line workers and other shoppers that you think their lives matter less than the milk you stopped in for. If that’s what you think, then, by all means, continue being an asshole, I guess.

“But *I’m* not sick! So I can’t get anyone else sick.”

:FACEPALM: Not sure if you’ve watched the news these past few weeks, (LOL of course you have), but you wouldn’t necessarily know if you were infected or not. You could be an asymptomatic spreader. 

Yes, bitch. You can infect almost 10k people. If the , that means that one of every 200 people you infect will die.

That’s 50 people you will be responsible for killing, you unbelievable moron.

WHICH IS WHY YOU SHOULD BE WEARING A FUCKING MASK.

Today in Washington state, our rate of infection, or R0, is 1.1. That means if you have the virus, you are infecting more than 1 person. That’s not good. In fact, most experts recommend an infection rate of less than 1.0 for two weeks before starting to re-open.

In King County, our R0 today is .98. That’s good, right?

No, dumbass. Because at the end of April, it was .92. It shouldn’t be going up. It should be going down.

This means that you people aren’t wearing your fucking masks and I don’t fucking understand why.

IT IS NOT HARD JUST WEAR THE FUCKING THING

Look you dicks, when the virus hit and the hospitals started to become too busy for the critical care doctors to handle, my husband left his medical practice to help out in the ICU. He didn’t have to. He could have just stayed at home and done telehealth, but he felt compelled to help out. He’s not alone. Thousands and thousands of medical professionals all over this country dropped everything and came running because they thought that by flattening the curve, lives could be saved and society could start reopening more quickly. 

The LEAST you can do is cover your damn face with a fucking mask so you don’t end up killing people.

Shit.

Source: JUST WEAR A FUCKING MASK, YOU FUCKS

Film Review: “My Donkey, My Lover and I”


Laure Calamy and Patrick the donkey steal the show in Caroline Vignal’s funny and original comedy, a work awarded the Cannes Official Selection Label and which is soon to hit cinemas in France

“It this your donkey? Is he giving you a hard time? It’s the same for everyone, you have to learn to get along.” When, on a romantic whim, the protagonist of Caroline Vignal’s My Donkey, My Lover and I – awarded the 73rd Cannes Film Festival’s Official Selection Label and distributed in French cinemas by Diaphana from 16 September – decides to embark on a trek for which she is in no way prepared, she has no idea that she’s simultaneously triggering an epic countdown which will lead to her own self-discovery. It’s an initiatory journey set to the tune of a romantic comedy and against vast, magnificent landscapes, but it’s also a hilarious “buddy movie” which unites a woman and a donkey, paints a moving portrait and magnifies the virtues of stripping back to the essentials and getting back to nature (without concealing the complications such a process involves).

“Et je sens la fièvre qui me mord”. Just like in Véronique Sanson’s song Amoureuse, which teacher Antoinette (Laure Calamy) performs, ablaze, before an audience of disconcerted parents at the school’s end of year celebration, our protagonist is in full emotional and sensual bloom, owing to her secret affair with Vladimir (Benjamin Lavernhe), the father of one of her Year 5 students. But their plans for a week of freedom in Paris are brutally upended: Vladimir, his wife (Olivia Côte) and their daughter have changed plans and are now trotting off into the Cévennes region to embark on a hike with a donkey. But never mind! Impulsive Antoinette sets off on their trail (without telling anyone) and on the path walked and described in 1879 by Scottish writer Robert-Louis Stevenson in Travels With a Donkey in the Cévennes… On the itinerary are six stages of roughly twenty kilometres a day, with nightly stopovers scheduled in gites with all their communal meals and shared dorms.

Suffice to say, Antoinette causes an immediate stir among the seasoned hikers, especially after swiftly confessing the sentimental reason behind her trip. Her fame grows as the days pass and as the exhausting (but also cruelly funny) hardships mount up behind her, starting with the need to make her partner – the donkey, Patrick – advance. But what will happen if Antoinette’s wish to cross paths with Vladimir (encumbered by his young family) actually comes true?

Carried by the sensational Laure Calamy, who is wonderful in her delivery of a comic-come-pathetic performance whilst also offering up a moving display of bravery in adversity, the film paints a very beautiful portrait of a woman through the mirror of the unexpected bond she slowly forges with Patrick; one which starts off strained given the animal’s contrary nature, but which sees them gradually grow accustomed to one another (with Antoinette telling him a bit about her life, notably her “gift for falling in love with the worst possible guy, at the worst possible time, in the worst possible place”). Together they form a duo which raises a lot of laughs, gracing a storyline which proceeds at the soothing pace of the walk and of the unexpected encounters they experience amidst nigh-on desert-like, breath-taking panoramas. It’s an ideal setting for re-centring oneself and for a feature film as charming as this one.

Source: Review: My Donkey, My Lover and I

Fromage Fort Is a Cheesy Spread Made From Wine, Cheese, and Butter

Cheese, butter, wine—name a more iconic trio.

The only thing better than a good recipe? When something’s so easy to make that you don’t even need one. Welcome to It’s That Simple, a column where we talk you through the process of making the dishes and drinks we can make with our eyes closed.

My parents are notorious cheese hoarders. There is never a time when I’m at their house and their cheese drawer isn’t overflowing with Havarti for my mom and a sharp Irish or Australian cheddar for my dad, plus whatever called their names at the grocery store that week.

Unfortunately I’ve inherited this trait. I can’t resist combing through any “just-enough” cheese bin and taking one or two home with me. But when a regular cheese-and-cracker combo isn’t hitting the spot anymore, or I have a leftover hunk from a recipe and I don’t know what to do with the rest, fromage fort is my savior. Quite literally meaning “strong cheese” in French, it is the divine combination of cheese, butter, and wine. Blended up with the allium or herbs of your choice, it becomes an impossibly addictive and infinitely adaptable spread, and though it feels posh, the only thing you need to make it is a food processor.

It requires about 8 oz. cheese, room temperature (you can always do more, but depending on the size of your food processor, you may have a hard time doing less). Part of the fun is figuring out which cheeses to play against each other. In general bluer, funkier, or saltier cheeses will have a more dominating flavor than milder cheeses, so use less of them if you want the flavors of any other cheeses to come through. Try balancing 1 or 2 oz. of your blue or funky cheese with 3 or 4 oz. of something mild and buttery, like Muenster or Gouda, and round out the rest with familiar fridge standbys like goat cheese, Parmesan, or cheddar. Grate any harder cheeses and cube or crumble softer cheeses. If you want to add garlic—and you do—give a clove a rough chop. Continue reading “Fromage Fort Is a Cheesy Spread Made From Wine, Cheese, and Butter” →