No anything? Say it ain’t so, Joe

By Michael Stevenson

Trump just said if Joe Biden is elected president, there will be “no anything.” Well, that sure doesn’t sound like fun! Should I still vote Biden? Hell … now I’m not so sure!

I do not want “no anything” because then there would be no dark roast coffee, no scotch, no Celtics basketball, no Turner Classic Movies, no chameleons, no music festivals, no used record shops, no Zaz, no mom, no New Orleans, no great new Keen™ sandals that I just got, no friends in Paris, no October ocean swims, no Everly Bothers, Coen Brothers, Dardenne Brothers, Avett Brothers, soul brothers, no Brother Can You Spare a Dime? No sisters, no Sister Barbara, R.S.M.

No angels, no devils, no pesto, no Châteauneuf-du-Pape, no oysters, no imitating Aunt Mary’s dialect, no Provence, no NPR, no Tanglewood, no biking, hiking, swimming or orgasmic hayfever sneezing.

No finding money. No new friends. No old friends. No Julie Harris as “Abra” in East of Eden, no saying “No!”, no saying “I don’t know”, no dogs, no Wooly Mammoths who may be cloned, no Spring crocus, no bird’s nest, no grilled NY sirloin, no New York, no Vonnegut, no poetry, no Ireland, no windy days, rainy days, no Rainy Days And Mondays Always Get Me Down, no Cheerios, no cheer, no Terry Gross, no milk coming out of laughing children’s noses, no St. Patrick’s Day, no corned beef, no Francis Cabrel, no saying “Oui!”
But I can’t vote Trump. Must convince Biden this NO ANYTHING agenda will not work. I’ve got work to do.